Alex: Hey everyone, welcome back to the show! Today we're diving into a really important book: “The Memo” by Minda Harts. If you’ve ever felt like getting ahead at work is way harder for women of color, or just wondered why the corporate ladder feels…different, then this is for you. Michelle: Yeah, or if you're operating under the assumption of “just work hard and keep your head down, and you'll make it," well, spoiler alert, it's often not that straightforward. Especially when the game is kind of rigged, right? Alex: Exactly. “The Memo” really lays it all out there. Minda Harts doesn't hold back in calling out the uncomfortable truths: the racism, the wage disparities, the lack of diverse representation, and, let's be honest, the office politics that disproportionately affect women of color. But look, it's not just a depressing read, it's a real guide to empowerment. Michelle: And that’s what we're going to dig into today. We’re going to look at it from three different angles. First, we'll talk about the "invisible walls"—you know, the systemic barriers that are often hard to see but are definitely there. Then, we'll explore how things like self-advocacy and networking can become the bridges over those walls. And finally, allyship—what genuine support actually looks like, and how it can help tear those walls down for good. Alex: This conversation isn't just about career advancement; it's really about equity, empowerment, and ultimately rewriting the rules. So, let's jump in!

Alex: Okay, Michelle, let’s “really” get into these systemic barriers we talked about. This is the core of workplace inequality, and you’ve got to understand what women of color are facing before you can even think about empowerment strategies. Michelle: Exactly. Because you can't tackle a problem you can't see, right? And these barriers aren't always obvious. They're kind of like... office wallpaper. They’re so ingrained we barely notice them anymore. So, what are some of the big barriers Harts points out in The Memo? Alex: Great question. Systemic racism is “really” the base problem, right? It shows up in policies, processes, even the everyday interactions. Like hiring and promotions. Women of color are often passed over, not because they’re not qualified, but because of unconscious biases and stereotypes. Michelle: Like Jonelle’s story in the book. She’s killing it at her job, but when it's time for a promotion, suddenly she’s not "leadership material." It’s like her qualifications just disappear the second race enters the picture. Seriously? Alex: Exactly! And unfortunately, her story isn't the exception; it is the rule. Women of color repeatedly get labeled as too aggressive, too emotional, or just not a "good fit." None of which has anything to do with their actual skills. It's like there’s this impossible standard they’re supposed to meet, you know, one designed for someone completely different. Michelle: It's like a rigged audition. Doesn’t matter how talented you are if the casting director already has someone else in mind for the lead, right? But this doesn't just affect promotions, does it? It spills into the day-to-day stuff, too? Alex: Oh, definitely. Microaggressions are huge. Those subtle, indirect digs – having their ideas dismissed in meetings, their names constantly mispronounced. They might seem small on the surface, but they add up. It's like a constant drip, sending the message: "You don't belong here." Michelle: Yeah, it's like trying to swim upstream, except the water’s full of tiny, sharp rocks. What does that do to you emotionally, you know? It’s gotta wear you down. Alex: Absolutely. It's not just about missing out on opportunities. The emotional toll is massive. Harts talks about impostor syndrome as one result, this constant feeling of not being good enough, even when their work proves otherwise. And then there's the extra emotional labor: correcting biases, proving their worth, managing perceptions. It's draining. Michelle: And that emotional labor is unpaid, of course. We can't forget that. Companies expect them to "fix" workplace bias by educating others or working extra hard to seem "non-threatening." and wash their hands of responsibility while profiting from that labor. Alex: Right! And when burnout happens, they blame the individual for not pulling themselves up or having "thicker skin." It's a vicious cycle, and it's systemic. That's exactly why Harts stresses that this isn't about just trying harder. It's about fixing structural inequalities. Michelle: It’s like she's saying traditional career advice just doesn't work here. Like, Lean In is... handing out umbrellas in a hurricane and saying, "Stay dry." Sure, great for a drizzle, but when you're drowning in systemic racism and gender bias? Useless. Alex: Exactly. Harts draws from her own personal experiences here. She talks about trying to follow that advice and how it backfired on her. Assertiveness that might be praised in a white woman was penalized for her. The same strategies just don't work when the playing field is that uneven. Michelle: It’s like showing up to a basketball game, but everyone else signed up for golf; and you’re the only one with the basketball rules! Even when you are an amazing player, someone moves the goalpost. Alex: That’s the perfect metaphor. This bad advice all feeds into what she calls the invisibility of women of color. They’re either left out completely or tokenized. It’s dehumanizing. Even worse, it makes them feel like they’re all alone in this struggle. Michelle: Isolation, huh? That sounds like the most glaring symptom! You’re already dealing with bias and roadblocks, and then you feel like no one gets it, like nobody's fighting beside you. Alex: Precisely. Which is why representation is so important. When fewer than 4% of executive roles are held by women of color, that's not just a statistic. It sets the tone. It subconsciously tells everyone that diversity is “really” only valued up to a certain level. Michelle: And here's the kicker: those companies will have a one-off diversity training and pat themselves on the back, thinking they've solved everything. How performative can you get? Alex: Oh, so performative. Harts points out that “real” change won't come from surface-level actions. It's not an optional PR move. It's about dismantling biases embedded in hiring, promotions, and everyday culture. That requires more than just "checking boxes"; it requires systemic reform! Michelle: Okay, so this isn't just a small adjustment, is it? It's not just hiring a Chief Diversity Officer and calling it a day. You're talking about overhauling the whole system. Alex: Absolutely. But here's the thing - change needs to happen from both sides. Organizations need to step up, but women of color also need tools to navigate this mess in the meantime. That's why Harts dedicates so much of this book to actionable empowerment strategies.

Alex: So, understanding these obstacles really sets the stage for figuring out how to overcome them, right? Now, “The Memo” really emphasizes self-advocacy and networking as the keys to empowerment. It’s not just about getting a seat at the table, but about creating opportunities, building connections, and really taking control of your career. Michelle: Okay, empowerment through self-advocacy and networking. So you're saying that it's not enough to just know the rules, but you need to find allies to mark your own way. Sounds simple, but this terrain is not so friendly. I mean, where do you even start? Alex: Well, Harts actually suggests starting by building your squad, you know? A network of people you trust who can guide you through the chaos. She really reframes networking from that stiff "collect business cards" thing into something much more personal and strategic. You’re not just adding LinkedIn connections; you’re really building genuine relationships. Michelle: Okay, so… less “networking schmooze-fest,” more “assembling your personal Avengers.” Got it. But what does a "squad" really look like? Alex: That’s a great question. Harts shares her own experiences about networking in those informal settings, which is super relatable. You know, after-work drinks or team lunches—those casual settings where people connect. At first, she avoided them because, as a woman of color, she felt out of place. But eventually, she realized that these aren’t just social events—they’re actually where a lot of professional access happens. Michelle: So decisions about who gets promoted aren't happening in the boardroom, but over drinks at happy hour? Alex: Exactly! Being present in those spaces changes how people see you. By showing up authentically, getting to know people, and letting them know you, you become more than just your work performance. She explains that these interactions really humanize you in a way that emails and meetings just can’t. Michelle: I get the logic, sure, but what if those spaces still feel alienating? I mean, it's not like you can just walk in and magically feel comfortable when you're the only person in the room who looks or thinks like you. Alex: Absolutely, and Harts acknowledges that. She emphasizes starting small. Maybe it's a coffee with a colleague you feel a connection with. Or consistently showing up at low-pressure things like team lunches. Over time, you become more visible and that can lead to bigger things. Michelle: Okay, but once you’re there, how do you stand out without losing yourself in the process? How do you make those connections stick? Alex: Authenticity is key, really. Harts says you don’t have to share everything about your life, but finding common ground can make connections feel more natural. Maybe it’s a project goal or even a TV show you both like—small things can build a connection. Michelle: Trojan horse strategy, got it. You get in with relatable vibes, right? And then people start to see past their biases. I get it, but networking isn't the only thing she talks about. What about that mentor-versus-sponsor thing? Alex: Oh, this is huge. Harts makes a real distinction between the two. A mentor is someone who gives guidance and advice, helping you find your way. But a sponsor? That’s someone who actually uses their influence to advocate for you. Michelle: So, a mentor gives you the map, but a sponsor grabs a megaphone at the entrance and tells everyone else that you're about to rock it? Alex: Exactly! Sponsors are the ones who really put their necks out there to make sure you get the opportunities you deserve. She tells stories of women of color who got incredible visibility because someone in power really made it their mission to open doors for them—like suggesting them for a leadership role or a high-profile project. Michelle: But how do you get a sponsor? You can't exactly walk into someone's office and say, "Hey, will you please vouch for me at the next big meeting?" Alex: Fair point! Her advice comes down to two things. First, consistently deliver excellent work. When your work speaks for itself, people will notice. Second, build relationships -- engage with potential sponsors, show them your progress, and let them see your value over time. Michelle: Basically, prove you're good, but also make sure they see it, huh? Alex: Exactly. And maintain those relationships through a balance of professional updates and genuine gratitude. It’s not just a transaction; it’s about trust and mutual respect. Michelle: Alright, so we’ve got the squad, the mentors, and the sponsors. But let’s talk about peer support. That might be the most relatable thing to anyone feeling alone at work. Alex: Totally. Harts shares how having a close confidante at work, you know, a colleague who became her "work-wife," really changed everything. They gave each other emotional support, a safe place to vent, and, you know, just validate each other’s experiences. Michelle: It’s like a tag team! When one’s down, the other one’s there to lift them up. That sounds like sanity-saving advice. Alex: Absolutely. Having someone who gets it—really gets it—can be a real lifeline. And this kind of peer connection doesn’t have to be just within your direct team. It can happen across departments, expanding your network and sparking collaborations Michelle: So, you send the squad into different corners of the workplace battlefield, gathering information, and sharing strategies. It sounds like an all-hands-on-deck defense. Alex: That’s a great way to think about it. Peer support isn’t just emotional; it’s strategic too. It turns isolation into solidarity, which makes navigating those systemic barriers feel a lot less impossible. Michelle: And honestly? When those informal networks and alliances start combining forces with mentorships and sponsorships? That sounds like building not just survival strategies, but real paths to success. Alex: Exactly. Harts says empowerment isn’t just about playing the game—it’s about changing the rules. Self-advocacy, strong networks, and meaningful sponsorships create new routes through a system that was designed to keep certain people out. It’s about shifting the narrative from just surviving to actually thriving.

Alex: So, after putting these strategies into action, it's natural to discuss the broader implications of collective action and systemic change. This really gets to the heart of how real transformation happens – through collective advocacy and allyship. Individual empowerment is key, but scaling up those efforts into collective action is what ultimately creates systemic equity. Michelle: Right, shifting from focusing on “me” to focusing on “we.” It’s not just about making your own way, but paving a wider path for others, you know? Makes sense. But let's dive in – what exactly does Minda Harts say about allyship? I ask because, honestly, the word feels a bit…overused these days. Alex: I hear you. But Harts' take on allyship is anything but superficial. She sees it as active support. Not just a pat on the back or a simple "I see you," but real, intentional engagement to challenge bias and dismantle inequities. For instance, it’s about speaking up when women of color are, say, sidelined during meetings. Michelle: Oh, the good old meeting dismissal. You know, when someone makes a spot-on point, and then, a few minutes later, someone else repeats it and acts like it's their own original thought. I've seen that play out so many times. Alex: Exactly! Harts emphasizes how allies can redirect the conversation in moments like that, by saying something like, "I really think [her idea] deserves more attention." It's about giving credit where it's due and making sure her voice isn't overlooked. These seemingly small actions can have a big impact because they disrupt those patterns of erasure. Michelle: But it’s not just about the words allies say then and there, is it? There’s gotta be some behind-the-scenes work too, right? Self-reflection, for example. I mean, no one really enjoys admitting they’ve been complicit in an unfair system. Alex: Couldn’t agree more. Allyship really starts with acknowledging privilege and examining one's own biases. Harts specifically asks white allies to unpack their biases and understand how their advantages may be unintentionally perpetuating the system. Without that self-reflection, activism can easily become just for show. Michelle: Okay, reflecting is step one, sure. But what about actual advocacy? How far does allyship need to go? Alex: Quite far! Harts is clear – you can’t just stop at self-reflection. Allyship means reimagining your role in the system to actively change outcomes. Like, for instance, advocating for fairer hiring practices, endorsing women of color for promotions, or even tackling pay gaps. We're talking about tangible actions that lead to measurable results. Michelle: Okay, so no more "thoughts and prayers" level of support – got it. But here's a question: how do allies stay in their lane? How do they amplify marginalized voices without…you know, taking over the microphone? Alex: That’s a really critical point. Effective allyship amplifies voices; it doesn't overpower them. Which means listening more than speaking, making sure the narrative goes back to women of color, and ensuring the space is theirs to shape, while you offer support where needed. Basically, lead alongside, not over. Michelle: That's a tricky balance, isn't it? Nobody wants to be the "white savior" who barges into every room. But at the same time, staying silent makes you complicit. It's a fine line to walk. Alex: Definitely, and Harts addresses this by saying that allies need to be comfortable being uncomfortable. Being an ally isn't about making yourself feel good for doing the right thing. It's about committing to action, even when it's tough or unpopular. Michelle: And this scales up, right? From individual allyship to collective advocacy. I imagine that’s where the real magic starts happening – when you get more people joining forces. Alex: Absolutely. The collective piece here is about building a momentum that individual action just can't sustain on its own. Take the Women of Color Equity Initiative, for example. It's a program Harts mentions where companies are connected with qualified women of color for leadership roles. It's directly tackling the systemic exclusion of women of color from these roles by getting rid of excuses like, "We can't find qualified candidates." Michelle: Oh, right, the classic "pipeline problem." Companies act like women of color are these mythical creatures, you know, that don’t exist at management levels, when really, they just aren’t looking in the right places. This initiative completely flips that on its head. Alex: Exactly! It makes talent visible and puts pressure on companies to actually step up. And programs like this don't just create opportunities, they also show what real advocacy looks like. Michelle: But this collective advocacy really has to go even further, doesn't it? Beyond just databases and connections, it's about completely rewriting workplace norms. Alex: Definitely. It’s not just about access, it’s about building policies that create equity. Harts advocates for things like transparent salary structures, affirmative action in leadership promotions, and systematically dismantling exclusionary cultural practices in workplaces. These aren’t just extras – they're necessities. Michelle: Here’s something I’ve been mulling over. If allyship is about amplifying voices, what does collaboration look like among the women themselves? Systemic change isn’t just about allies lending a hand; it’s also about internal solidarity, right? Alex: Absolutely. Harts doesn't shy away from addressing this either. She brings up how workplaces can often pit marginalized people against one another, fostering competition instead of collaboration. It's called the "only one syndrome," where the single woman of color in the room feels like she constantly has to protect her position instead of, say, reaching back to help others. Michelle: Ugh, that syndrome must be mentally exhausting. Plus, I imagine it's detrimental to the bigger picture – the whole point of representation is to make more representation possible. Alex: Exactly. And Harts shares some really great examples of leaders who've rejected this scarcity mindset. Women like Keisha Smith-Jeremie have championed mentoring and peer collaboration as a form of advocacy. They’ve shown that when you invest in supporting each other, everyone rises together. Michelle: Right, like a rising tide lifting all boats. But let's be real, this internal dynamic isn't just some feel-good message. It has to be strategic, too, especially in workplaces that are rigged against you. Alex: Oh, absolutely. Harts outlines practical strategies to foster that internal collaboration, things like peer resource groups, mentorship circles, and alliances that cross departments. When women of color commit to helping each other, they challenge the whole system of isolation that the system thrives on. Michelle: And the more unified that group becomes, the harder it is for organizations to ignore them or dismiss their issues. They stop being seen as isolated voices and start becoming a movement. Alex: Exactly, Michelle. It turns fragmented efforts into collective power. And at the heart of it all is allyship – working both within the community and with broader allies to create meaningful, lasting change.

Alex: Okay, so to sum it up, “The Memo” isn't just another career guide for women of color trying to navigate the corporate world. It’s really a call for some serious systemic change. We talked about the barriers they face, the importance of speaking up for yourself, and how crucial it is to build strong support networks—you know, those squads, mentors, and sponsors. And we can’t forget the vital role allies play in all this. It’s both about individual and collective efforts that can “really” shake things up. Michelle: So, the core message is… it’s not just about getting by in a flawed system, is it? It's about questioning it, changing it, and making sure that climbing the career ladder isn't a lonely journey. For women of color, it’s about acknowledging your value. And for allies, well, it's time to step up and create opportunities where they just don't naturally exist. Alex: Precisely. I guess we can leave everyone with this thought: equality requires all of us. Stand up for yourself, support those around you, and, crucially, demand more from systems that weren't designed to be inclusive in the first place. Change doesn’t just occur, it's something you make.