Mark: A recent study found 75% of Americans are chronically dehydrated. But what if the thing we're most starved for isn't water, but self-awareness? Michelle: Honestly, my self-awareness is at its lowest when I'm staring at a cookie. I know I shouldn't, but my brain just goes offline. It’s like all rational thought is replaced by a single, flashing neon sign that says, "COOKIE." Mark: That exact battle, the one between our best intentions and that flashing neon sign, is at the heart of the book we're diving into today: The Self-Care Solution by Dr. Jennifer Ashton. Michelle: And she's not just any author. She's the chief medical correspondent for ABC News, an Emmy-winner, an OB-GYN... but this book is fascinating because it's born from her own personal experiments, not just abstract medical theory. She literally turned her own life into a laboratory for a year. Mark: Exactly. And it all started with one simple, almost cliché, New Year's challenge that spiraled into a profound journey of self-discovery.

Michelle: Okay, let me guess. A New Year's resolution? Those things have a notoriously short shelf life. Mark: That’s the interesting part. She frames it as a challenge, not a resolution. In January 2018, Dr. Ashton, a high-achieving, goal-oriented physician, had this moment of reckoning. She was constantly advising her patients to moderate their alcohol intake, citing all the health risks. Then she realized she wasn't really following her own advice. Michelle: Ah, the classic "do as I say, not as I do." I think a lot of us can relate to that. Mark: Precisely. But it wasn't that she thought she had a drinking problem. It was more of a scientific curiosity. She was drinking out of habit—a glass of wine to unwind, a drink at a social event. So she decided to run an experiment on herself: a completely "Dry January." No alcohol for 31 days. Michelle: I can already feel the social anxiety. That sounds simple on paper, but in practice, it’s tough. How did she handle the constant questions, the "Oh, just have one!" pressure? Mark: Her strategy was brilliant in its simplicity: she went public. She announced it on Good Morning America. She told her friends, her family, her social media followers. It turned a private struggle into a public challenge. Michelle: That’s smart. It creates accountability. You can't just quietly give up when your entire social circle, and in her case, national television viewers, know you're doing it. Mark: And the response was shocking to her. She wrote, "People were motivated by the idea of a challenge and excited to join me—you would have thought I was offering a month of free candy, not the chance to avoid alcohol." It created this incredible sense of community. Michelle: So the "hack" wasn't just willpower, it was a kind of social engineering. But what were the results? Was it really that life-changing? Mark: The physical results were immediate and noticeable. She talks about her skin looking better, losing some stubborn belly fat, and having more energy. But the real breakthrough was mental. She realized she had learned more about herself in 30 days than she had in years. Michelle: What kind of things? Mark: She discovered that she didn't actually miss the alcohol itself; she missed the ritual. The habit. She found that she enjoyed social gatherings more because she was more present and her conversations were more meaningful. The biggest takeaway was this profound sense of empowerment. By conquering this one specific, manageable challenge, she felt like she could do anything. Michelle: And that one small success gave her the momentum for the whole year. It wasn't a grand, sweeping plan to overhaul her life. It was just one domino that she tipped over. Mark: Exactly. It became the catalyst. She thought, if I can learn this much from 30 days of no alcohol, what else can I learn? And that led her to the next challenge, and the next, moving from the purely physical to something much more internal.

Michelle: Okay, so after the success of Dry January, where did she go next? I'm picturing more physical challenges, like running a marathon or something. Mark: You'd think so, but she pivoted. After a month of push-ups and planks in February, her March challenge was something she, as a self-described "Type A" personality, had always resisted: meditation. Michelle: Oh, I feel that. For a certain type of person, the instruction to "sit still and do nothing" feels like a form of psychological torture. It’s like, my to-do list is screaming at me, and you want me to just… sit here? Mark: That was her exact mindset. She had actually learned Transcendental Meditation a few years earlier from the famous teacher Bob Roth. For a year, she did it religiously, 20 minutes, twice a day, and felt amazing. She had more energy, less stress, better focus. But then, during a period of intense personal and professional stress, she dropped it. Michelle: Wait, hold on. She stopped meditating at the exact moment she probably needed it most? That’s fascinatingly human. Mark: It is. And when she decided to make it her March challenge, she was full of excuses. The biggest one being, "I don't have the time." This is where the book offers one of its most powerful insights. She reconnected with her teacher, Bob, who told her something that reframed everything. Michelle: What did he say? Mark: He said, "You don't find the time, you make the time." It's a simple phrase, but for her, it was a revelation. She started viewing those 20 minutes not as time lost, but as a critical investment in her focus and efficiency for the other 23 hours and 40 minutes of the day. Michelle: That’s a great way to put it. It’s not a chore; it's a tool. It's not about emptying your mind, which feels impossible, but about training your attention. It’s like a bicep curl for your brain. Mark: A perfect analogy. And the book is packed with the science to back it up. Research shows meditation can literally alter your gene expression to reduce inflammation, it can improve sleep, and some studies suggest it can be as effective as antidepressants for managing mood. For Dr. Ashton, the effects were tangible. She felt calmer, more positive, and she noticed that on the days she missed her meditation, she was more disorganized and less mentally sharp. Michelle: So the self-care journey evolved. It started with an act of subtraction—taking away alcohol. Then it became an act of addition—adding a mental practice. She’s building a more holistic toolkit. Mark: Exactly. She's moving from the outside in. And she’s proving to herself, month by month, that she can take control of these different aspects of her well-being. She’s building an incredible track record of success. Michelle: Okay, so she conquers alcohol, masters meditation... she sounds unstoppable. But the book takes a really interesting turn, and it's my favorite part, because she completely face-plants on the sugar challenge.

Mark: It’s the most relatable and, I think, the most important part of the whole book. In September, she decides to tackle "Less Sugar." And she goes into it with a bit of arrogance. She thinks, "I did Dry January, I do push-ups, I meditate. How hard can this be?" Michelle: Famous last words. Sugar is a different beast entirely. Mark: She found that out on Day 3. Her son came over for a family dinner and brought a box of chocolate chip cookies from a world-famous pastry chef, Jacques Torres. And for Dr. Ashton, these cookies were a major trigger food. Michelle: Oh no. I can see where this is going. The ambush cookie. Mark: She describes the internal battle. She tries to resist. She breaks off just a tiny piece. And then, she says, she ate the whole thing. She writes, and this is a direct quote, "I felt like an addict, entirely powerless over my vice." Michelle: Wow. That's incredibly vulnerable for a medical doctor and public figure to admit. But it’s so real. I think we’ve all had that moment of powerlessness with a particular food. Mark: It gets better. A few days later, she's buying an oversized bar of dark chocolate, telling herself it's for her daughter. She rationalizes it by remembering a study about cocoa aiding muscle recovery. Michelle: Oh, the rationalization! "Dark chocolate is healthy! It has antioxidants!" I've told myself that while eating an entire family-sized bar. It's a universal coping mechanism. Mark: She ends up eating half the bar before her daughter even gets home. And the month continues like this. She goes to a hockey tournament and gets ice cream. Her son brings home another brand of cookies, and she eats three. She realizes, to her horror, that this "Less Sugar" challenge is causing her to eat more sugar than she had in months. Michelle: So the challenge backfired completely. But what did she take away from it? Because it sounds like the most valuable chapter in the book is the one about total failure. Mark: It is. She concludes the chapter by admitting she completely failed the challenge. But she says she succeeded in learning more about herself than in any other month. It taught her three things. First, the incredible, drug-like power of sugar addiction. Second, it gave her a profound sense of empathy for her patients who struggle with addiction and weight. She understood their feeling of powerlessness on a visceral level. Michelle: And the third thing? Mark: Self-compassion. She quotes the book, "Don’t be afraid to fail: it will likely teach you more about yourself than a dozen successes." The failure wasn't a mark against her character; it was data. It was the most valuable piece of data she collected all year because it taught her about her own limits and the importance of humility.

Michelle: So the book isn't really a 'how-to' guide for a perfect, disciplined life. It's more of a 'how-to' guide for self-experimentation. The goal isn't to succeed at every single challenge. Mark: Exactly. The real 'self-care solution' isn't the list of twelve habits. It's the mindset of becoming a curious, compassionate scientist of your own life. It's about collecting data on yourself—what works, what doesn't, what your triggers are—and then adjusting your approach without judgment. Michelle: That makes so much sense. The book has had a bit of a mixed reception online. Some readers love the practical, month-by-month structure, but others find her lifestyle a bit unrelatable. But I think they might be missing the point. The lesson isn't to copy her life. Mark: You've nailed it. The lesson is to copy her method. The book's true value is in its framework for personal discovery. It argues that sustainable change doesn't come from a massive, painful overhaul. It comes from small, consistent, and sometimes failed, experiments that slowly build self-awareness and self-trust. Michelle: So maybe the challenge for our listeners isn't to do a Dry January or meditate for a month. Maybe it's just to pick one small thing—just one—and track it for a week. See what you learn. It could be anything: drinking more water, taking a ten-minute walk at lunch, or even, as she does in December, trying to laugh more. Mark: I love that. What would your one experiment be? Let us know your thoughts. We're always curious to hear how these ideas land with you. Michelle: This is Aibrary, signing off.