Mark: Alright Michelle, I'm going to say the title of a book, and I want your honest, gut-reaction, one-liner review. Ready? My Morning Routine: How Successful People Start Every Day Inspired. Michelle: Oh, that's easy. It's the book that makes you feel guilty about your snooze button before you've even had coffee. Mark: Exactly! It has that vibe, doesn't it? But what’s fascinating is that the authors, Benjamin Spall and Michael Xander, probably wouldn't want you to feel guilty. They started this whole thing as an online magazine, interviewing hundreds of successful people, and their biggest takeaway wasn't some magic formula. Michelle: Let me guess, it was that there is no magic formula? Mark: Precisely. The book is less of a 'how-to' manual and more of an 'idea buffet.' It's filled with stories, not rules. And that’s really the most important place to start. Michelle: Okay, I like an idea buffet. But if there's no magic formula, what's the point? Isn't every productivity guru on the planet telling us the secret is to wake up at 5 AM, drink a gallon of lemon water, and run a marathon before breakfast?

Mark: That is the exact myth this book sets out to dismantle. The authors themselves confess to having spent most of their adult lives with chaotic mornings—waking up late, grabbing their phones, and starting the day in a state of panic. Their research wasn't about finding the one perfect routine, but about finding the principles behind effective ones. Michelle: So it’s not about the 5 AM Club. Mark: Not at all. In fact, the book is full of contrasts. You have someone like General Stanley McChrystal, the retired four-star general, who for forty years has woken up at 4:00 A.M. to work out for ninety minutes. It's an ironclad discipline. He says if you make it hard to work out, you won't do it, so he lays out his clothes the night before. Total preparation. Michelle: Wow. Okay, a four-star general's routine is inspiring, but it also feels completely out of reach for a normal person with kids, a commute, and a cat that needs feeding. That’s a common critique of these kinds of books, right? That the routines often feel like they belong to a very privileged group of people who have a lot of control over their time. Mark: You're absolutely right, and the book implicitly acknowledges that. That's why the general's story is placed alongside someone like author Ryan Holiday. He wakes up around 8:00 A.M. His one simple rule is to do one thing—usually writing for an hour or two—before checking email. His morning is calm, focused, and starts much later. The point isn't the 4 AM wake-up call; it's the intentionality. Michelle: I see. So the general and the author are both successful, but their approaches are polar opposites. Mark: Exactly. And the authors drive this home with a personal story. One of the authors, Benjamin, is an early riser, but his wife is a total night owl. He had to learn that his ideal morning wasn't her ideal morning. They had to adapt. The book’s message is clear: find what works for you. Don't feel pressured to meet some stranger’s standard of productivity. It’s about your values, not your alarm clock. Michelle: That’s a much more forgiving approach. I was worried this was going to be a guilt trip, but it sounds more like a permission slip to figure out your own rhythm. Mark: It is. It’s about finding that rhythm and then using it to get what the book calls a 'first win.'

Michelle: A 'first win'? What does that mean? Mark: It's the idea that you can set the tone for your entire day with one single, meaningful accomplishment in the morning. It’s about building momentum. The book features Shane Parrish, the founder of Farnam Street, who has this brilliant perspective on it. He says, "If I got up in the morning and the first thing I did was check email, I’d be allowing others to dictate my priorities for the day." Michelle: Oh, I know that feeling. You open your inbox and suddenly you're putting out a dozen tiny fires that other people started, and your own important work gets pushed to the afternoon, when you're already tired. Mark: Exactly. So Parrish plans his two or three most important projects the night before, and he dedicates his first 60 to 90 minutes of the day to that deep work. No email, no social media. He wins that first battle, and the rest of the day feels like, as Ryan Holiday puts it, "extra credit." Michelle: So it's like setting up the first domino. It's a small, focused push, but it’s what knocks over all the other, bigger tasks throughout the day. Mark: That's a perfect analogy. And it doesn't have to be some monumental task like writing a chapter of a book. The book talks about the power of "keystone habits"—small actions that trigger a chain of other good habits. The most famous example is making your bed. Michelle: Come on, making your bed? That feels a little... simplistic. Mark: It sounds it, but the psychology is powerful. One person in the book, Heidi Sistare, says, "When the bed is made I feel like my world is clean and orderly and I can focus all my attention on my work." It’s your first task of the day completed. It’s a small signal to your brain that you are in control, that you can create order from chaos. That one small win makes the next win easier. Michelle: Okay, I can see that. But what’s the difference between this 'deep work' and just being busy? I can be very busy in the morning, but it doesn't always feel productive. Mark: That's a crucial distinction. The book quotes neuroscientist Darya Rose, who says, "Mornings prime your brain for how it will function the rest of the day. Are you going to be distracted and bounce around from project to project? Or are you going to be focused and choose your activities consciously and with intention?" Deep work is the latter. It's focused, single-tasking on something that matters. Answering emails is being busy. Writing a difficult proposal is deep work. Michelle: Right. One is reactive, the other is creative. This all sounds great in a perfect world. But what happens on the days you just... can't? When you're sick, or the baby was up all night, or you just fail?

Mark: And that is the most important and, I think, most realistic part of the book. It reveals the big secret: a great morning routine doesn't actually start in the morning. It starts the night before. Michelle: The evening routine. The unsung hero of productivity. Mark: Absolutely. The book is filled with examples. David Kadavy, an author, makes a point to wind down by 10:00 P.M., turning off screens or wearing blue-light-blocking glasses. He says, "The more I wind down the night before, the better my brain works in the morning." And then you have the cautionary tale of Arianna Huffington. Michelle: Oh, her story is famous. Mark: It's terrifying. In 2007, she was so sleep-deprived from building her media empire that she fainted from exhaustion, hit her head on her desk, and broke her cheekbone. That was her wake-up call. She realized that hustle culture's mantra of 'sleep when you're dead' is, as she puts it, a recipe for burnout. Now, her transition to sleep is a sacrosanct ritual. No devices, a hot bath, physical books. Sleep is non-negotiable. Michelle: So preparation is key. But even with the best preparation, life happens. Mark: It does. And that's where adaptation comes in. The book tells this incredible story about Sarah Kathleen Peck, a college swimmer. The night before a huge competition, she had a terrible asthma attack from the pool chemicals and got almost no sleep. She went to her coach and said, "I feel awful." Michelle: I can't imagine the panic. Mark: Right. But the coach didn't say, "Too bad." He told her to go lie down for thirty minutes and visualize getting the best rest of her life. When she came back, he said something amazing. He said, "If you had perfect circumstances, you could win this race. The bigger challenge is winning even when you’re down. Get out there and fight, despite the circumstances." Michelle: Wow. That gives me chills. It reframes failure completely. It’s not about avoiding failure, it’s about performing in spite of it. Mark: Exactly. And that's a lesson every parent in the book has learned. One mother, Jamie Morea, jokingly calls her toddler an "adorable miniature dictator" who constantly upends her plans. She says, "It’s all about flexibility and unpredictability. I can’t be too wedded to a specific routine or I’m bound to be disappointed when things go awry. I mean, poop happens. Literally." For her, and for so many people, adaptation isn't a backup plan; it's the main strategy.

Michelle: That's so true. The idea of a perfect, uninterrupted morning is a fantasy for most of us. So, when you strip it all away—the 4 AM workouts, the green juices, the meditation apps—what's the one thing we should really remember from this book? Mark: I think it’s that your morning routine isn't about becoming a productivity machine. It's about creating a small, sacred space in your day that is entirely yours. It's a quiet act of self-respect in a world that is constantly demanding your attention. And that act of starting with yourself is what fuels your ability to handle everything else. Michelle: That’s a much more profound way of looking at it than just 'checking off boxes.' Mark: It is. There's a quote from Courtney Carver in the book that sums it up perfectly. She says, "When I’m tempted to skip my morning routine or another form of self-care, I remind myself that I can better serve the people I love and the projects I care about when I start with me." Michelle: I love that. It’s not selfish, it’s strategic. Okay, so maybe the challenge for our listeners this week isn't to copy a whole routine from a CEO or a general. Maybe it's just to add one five-minute intentional act to their morning. Something that's just for them. Mark: That's a brilliant takeaway. Don't overhaul your life. Just add one thing. Maybe it's five minutes of reading, or stretching, or just drinking your coffee in silence without your phone. We'd love to hear what that one thing is for you. Let us know what you're trying out. Michelle: Find your one domino. Mark: Find your one domino. Michelle: This is Aibrary, signing off.