Mark: Michelle, if I told you we're covering a book called 'Be Fucking Awesome,' what's your one-sentence review, sight unseen? Michelle: It sounds like the literary equivalent of a Monster Energy drink being shotgunned in a gym parking lot. Mark: (Laughs) You are surprisingly close! We are indeed talking about Be Fucking Awesome by Dan Meredith. And he is a character—a former personal trainer who went from being deep in debt to building multiple successful businesses. Michelle: Let me guess, he has a lot of opinions. Mark: He does. And he apparently wrote this book in a single, caffeine-fueled week. It’s become this polarizing, underground hit for people who are tired of gentle, 'woo-woo' self-help. The reader reviews are all over the place—some people say it changed their life, others find it rambling and abrasive. Michelle: A kick in the pants, not a hug. I'm intrigued. So where does this... aggressive journey to awesomeness begin? Mark: It starts with a word most of us are taught to avoid at all costs: Selfishness.

Michelle: Oh, of course it does. Right out of the gate, he’s going for the controversial take. So what does he mean by 'Be Selfish'? Is it just about being a jerk to everyone? Mark: Not at all, and that’s the brilliant reframe. He quotes Michael Jordan, who said, "To be successful you have to be selfish... And once you get to your highest level, then you have to be unselfish." Meredith’s argument is that you can't help anyone if you're running on empty. It's the classic airplane safety briefing: fit your own oxygen mask before helping others. Michelle: Right, the oxygen mask analogy. I’ve heard that before, but it sounds like he takes it to an extreme. Mark: He does, because he lived the alternative. He tells this powerful story about his early thirties. He was working 100 to 120-hour weeks, juggling multiple businesses, all driven by this intense desire to provide for his family, especially his sister who has epilepsy. He was making good money, but he completely destroyed his own health. He burned out, got sick, and couldn't work at all. Michelle: Wow. So he was trying to be completely unselfish, and it made him useless to the very people he was trying to help. Mark: Exactly. He realized that by neglecting himself, he was failing everyone. So for him, being selfish isn't about ignoring others' needs. It’s about ruthlessly prioritizing your own time, energy, and well-being so that you actually have something left to give. It’s a strategic act of self-preservation. Michelle: Okay, that makes more sense. It’s not about entitlement, it's about sustainability. But it’s still a tough pill to swallow. Society really drills into us that selfishness is a vice. Mark: Which leads directly to his next point: 'Be Shameless.' If being selfish is about what you do, being shameless is about not caring what other people think about it. He argues that pride and ego are the biggest killers of progress. Michelle: I can see that. The fear of looking stupid or failing in front of people can be paralyzing. Mark: He has the most visceral story to illustrate this. He calls it "Shitgate." Michelle: Oh no. Do I want to know? Mark: You absolutely do. In his mid-twenties, he was broke in London and took a job as a floor manager at a strip club. One night, a toilet got blocked with sanitary products and overflowed. It was a legitimate biohazard. No one would touch it. Michelle: I don't blame them. Mark: But Meredith, needing the money and having zero pride in that moment, made a makeshift hazmat suit out of bin bags, a woodworking mask, and sunglasses, and he cleaned it all up. It was disgusting, thankless work. Michelle: That is... truly shameless. What happened? Mark: One of the dancers, seeing what he did, came over and gave him a ten-pound note out of sheer gratitude and respect. He said he kept that note for years as a reminder. It symbolized the absolute lowest point, but also the power of being willing to do the grunt work that no one else will. He wasn't too proud. Michelle: That’s an incredible story. So the message is, you don't have to literally clean up a biohazard, but you have to be willing to metaphorically get your hands dirty. You have to be willing to do the unglamorous, potentially embarrassing things to move forward. Mark: Precisely. You have to kill your ego before it kills your opportunities. And that shamelessness extends to asking for help, admitting you're wrong, and trying things that might fail. It’s about freedom from the judgment of others. Michelle: And freedom from your own pride. That’s a powerful combination. It’s like being selfish builds your foundation, and being shameless tears down the walls that keep you from building on it. Mark: That's a perfect way to put it. But once you have that foundation, you need fuel to actually build something. And the fuel he recommends is just as unconventional.

Michelle: Let me guess, it’s not positive affirmations and gratitude journaling. Mark: Not even close. His next principle is 'Be Spiteful.' Michelle: Spiteful! Come on. That just sounds so toxic. Like you're supposed to walk around holding grudges and plotting revenge. How is that 'awesome'? Mark: It’s another one of his brilliant reframes. He argues that spite, when channeled correctly, is one of the most powerful motivators on the planet. It’s not about seeking revenge on people. It's about using their doubt, their negativity, their underestimation of you as pure fuel. It's the 'I'll show you' energy. Michelle: Okay, the 'prove 'em wrong' mindset. I can get behind that. It feels a lot more powerful than just ignoring the haters. It’s about metabolizing their negativity into your own strength. Mark: Exactly. And he has another personal story for this. As a teenager, he was overweight and had a huge crush on a girl. He overheard her say to a friend, "I'd date him if he wasn't fat." Michelle: Ouch. That’s brutal for a teenager. Mark: It crushed him. But instead of just being sad, he got angry. He got spiteful. He started an extreme regimen of diet and exercise, running six miles every single day. In a few months, he lost a massive amount of weight. He said he never even spoke to the girl again; it wasn't about winning her over anymore. It was about proving to himself, and to the world, that he could do it. Michelle: That’s a great example. The spite wasn't the goal, it was the catalyst. It was the spark that lit the fire of his own ambition. Mark: Yes. But raw emotion, even powerful spite, isn't enough. It can burn you out if it’s not directed. This is where his other principles, 'Be Productive' and 'Be Relentless,' come in. They are the systems that channel the raw energy. Michelle: So the spite is the gasoline, but the productivity systems are the engine. You need both, otherwise you're just spinning your wheels in anger. What do these systems look like? Mark: They're incredibly practical and, true to form, brutally simple. He has the '3-5 System,' which he learned from a millionaire client. Every day, you write a list of no less than three and no more than five critical tasks for your business. That's it. It forces you to focus only on what truly matters and ignore the busywork. Michelle: I love that. It fights the overwhelm of the endless to-do list. What else? Mark: There’s the 'Dentist Appointment' philosophy. He says you should schedule one hour every single day for new business development. You treat it like a dentist appointment you cannot miss. It doesn't matter how busy you are with current clients; you do it every day. This prevents the 'feast or famine' cycle that so many entrepreneurs get stuck in. Michelle: That’s so smart. It’s about consistently planting seeds for the future, even when your barn is full today. It’s a relentless, non-negotiable habit. Mark: And that's the key word: relentless. He tells a story from his days as a headhunter, trying to land a big client. He called the hiring manager every Tuesday at 11 am. For weeks, he was told no, hung up on, dismissed. But he was always polite, always professional. He just kept showing up. Michelle: Pleasantly annoying. Mark: Exactly! Eventually, the manager started expecting his call. One week, the manager actually said, "Where were you? I was waiting for your call." Soon after, he had a position he couldn't fill, and he gave Meredith the shot. Dan filled it and became their sole recruiter, earning his company a fortune. It was pure, polite relentlessness. Michelle: These stories really bring it to life. It's not just a list of commands. It's a philosophy built from real, gritty experiences. You start with the internal permission to be selfish and shameless, then you fuel your journey with the fire of spite, and you direct that fire with relentless, simple, productive systems. Mark: That’s the entire framework. It’s a complete, if unconventional, operating system for getting things done.

Michelle: When you lay it all out like that, it’s actually a very logical, cohesive system. It’s just wrapped in this provocative, f-bomb-laden packaging that’s designed to shock you out of your complacency. Mark: I think that's the genius of it. What's fascinating about this book is its brutal honesty. It admits that the path to success isn't always paved with positive affirmations and vision boards. Sometimes it's messy. Sometimes it's fueled by so-called 'negative' emotions like spite. And it almost always requires a level of selfishness and shamelessness that makes polite society uncomfortable. Michelle: It really gives you permission to be human. To use all parts of yourself, not just the 'nice' and 'positive' parts. The core message isn't just 'be a jerk,' it's 'take radical ownership of your life and use whatever it takes to build it.' Mark: And to stop waiting for permission from others. The book's final message is that the only thing holding you back is the bullshit excuses you tell yourself. Michelle: I think that’s a perfect takeaway. Maybe the one thing listeners can do this week, inspired by this, is to identify one 'should' they're doing for others—something they feel obligated to do—and consciously replace it with one 'want' for themselves. A small, selfish, awesome act. Mark: I love that. A tiny rebellion of awesomeness. What's one 'should' you're dropping? We'd genuinely love to hear about the small, awesome changes you're making. Find us on our socials and let us know. Michelle: It’s a powerful idea. Be a little more selfish, a little more shameless, and a lot more awesome. Mark: This is Aibrary, signing off.